A recent press release describes the music of Death O’Connor as being “like Kraftwerk being sucked off in an alleyway by The Stooges”. Curious and a little dubious, Music Vice’s Melbourne-based writer Michael Bowser had a brief “conversation” with The Man (as opposed to The Band) himself…so with no further ado, ladies and gentlemen…Mr Death O’Connor.
“I suppose you could say we’re a totalitarian force… but then again our fans are too stupid to know what that means!”
So, exactly who or what is Death O’Connor? A person, a one man band?
Well, there’s a whole bunch of us, but as you can tell by “our” name I’m the creator, originator and brains behind the whole thing. There’s a few other guys I, uh, “exploit”, like our singer Wank Williams, keyboardist Honey Bee, bass player Bell-End Lugosi (who we actually had to sack for laziness a bunch of weeks back), and a few casuals like Urethra Franklin and Evel Longoria.
Those are some pretty strange names. I’m guessing they’re not the ones your poor Mums christened you with. What exactly have you got to hide, eh?!
My backing band are completely hideous! Seriously though, Death O’Connor is my real name, and any similar imagery to some other guy is, errrm….pure coincidence!
Pull the other one! Okay then, tell us about the “philosophy” behind Death O’Connor…
It’s simple. We’re serious about stupidity! We are the Morbidly Obtuse and we believe in a world where books should be banned, schools closed and the only religion is ME! I suppose you could say we’re a totalitarian force… but then again our fans are too stupid to know what that means!
I’d say it’s self-evident that you’re fans are stupid…they’d have to be to like your band in the first place! (Ha, just joshing, of course.) So what is it about yourself, precisely, that is so worthy of worship? Should we expect you to martyr yourself on stage one day, or are you just gonna do a GG Allin on us and die alone and face-down in a gutter?!
I suppose if you actually need to know the answer, I can quote one of our newest songs where it says: “We never try, and still achieve”. Which is true…I’ve never learned to play an instrument, and yet can only be described as a “virtuoso” on guitar. Even through school I never tried and still made out with several A’s in advanced subjects. Things come naturally to me, and what’s so wrong with me saying I’m so good at these things?
So you’re basically just an arrogant sod, then?
It’s justified! Next question!
Okay then, tell us a bit about the songwriting process. Is it difficult to manage things in a band with so many members coming in and out all the time?
To be quite honest, there ain’t all that much of a “songwriting” process…I get a tune in my head and I record it, I rarely write it down and that’s caused some problems in the past. As for other input, we’ll change some words about sometimes, or vocal patterns if whoever’s singing can’t get it right and I run out of patience.
As for the recording process, Wank Williams has a lot of input when he texts me twenty times an hour with ideas about the demos I send him….I sometimes send him back the same mixes and he doesn’t even notice!
The laptop makes up for my band’s musical inferiority, and we have been known to mime entire sets…which is great! Idiots paying to see people dancing to a computer!!! When we do play live, though, I stick to my guitar, and whoever’s there at the time plays what they want. We only use three or four notes.
I’m surprised you can count that high. Nice work! That Wank Williams certainly sounds like he lives up to his first name…
He had a string of hits in Germany back in the 90’s, doing Europop versions of country classics such as “I’m So Lonesome I Could Wank”, “I Wank The Line”, “Sweet Home Alawanka”, and a few more with puns that aren’t quite as funny as those I just mentioned. We’ll hopefully re-release a few at some point!
Okay, so tell us a bit more about some of the other members, then…this Honey Bee guy. Token “gay” member, perhaps?
HB is considered (though not by me) a “legend” in his own right, but things haven’t been going so well for him recently. I think the only reason he joined us was to boost his popularity a bit before he goes on one of those “Legends” tours. He released a bunch of albums quite a few years back, and is currently in court with Gary Glitter as he claims that Gary “stole” his songs, “Honey Bee, Part 2” and “Another Honey Bee Christmiss”. He was also part of a gang-war in the early 90’s, when NWA ripped off his song “Strate Outta Elgin”…which got a bit bloody, to say the least. He’s got a few videos up on Youtube of his celebrity rants; the boy has some real issues!
Okay, last question (phew!): Other than music, are there any vices you would like to share with all the lovely, family-oriented people out there in cyberland???
What kinda fuckin’ question is that for a serious musician like me!? I bet you don’t ask fuckin’ Henry Rollins or even those cunts in Rectal Examination that crap! I won’t answer shit like that from you!
[Actually Mr. O’ Connor, our fearless edtior Brian Banks did ask that very same question to Mr. Henry Rollins, who revealed his love of cheese popcorn.]
But if I really had to…I’d say it was pornography and teabagging.
Thank you very much, Mr O’Connor. And by the way, it’s been anything but a pleasure!
Stick it up your arse, Bowser. What are you…a Mario villain?
© Michael Bowser, Music Vice
Death O’Connor (Myspace) will be playing gigs around Melbourne very shortly. (Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.) Michael Bowser has never been, nor ever will be, a “Mario villain”, and is in the early stages of sueing Death O’Connor for slander (this interview made his Mum cry, such shame did it bring upon the family name).